I think the two are unrelated. You can be a great mom and trad wife. You can be a terrible mom and a trad wife. You can be a great mom who had a job/career. You can be a terrible mom who has a career. There is some interplay. It could be argued that trad wives have more resources, especially time to spend with their children. Personally, I feel if I was home with my kids all day I would go crazy and be a worse mom. Childcare is exhausting, and doing it all day takes a huge toll. I don’t think trad wives are generally more selfish than any others. I love picking my daughter up from day care and spending the evening with her. While on maternity leave, she got sick of me and wanted space.
What makes a good mom is listening to your child and their needs and adjusting and valuing them, rather than forcing them to conform to your wants. If you are someone who sees your kids as status, regardless of your profession you’re going to be a shitty parent. If you listen to your kids and see what they want, you’ll do better. My daughter loves her day care, she will cry if I pick her up to early. She loves the games and activities and the other kids, and the time away from me. If I was a trad wife, I’d be in denial she would be happier with me all day. But I’m sure some babies are the other way around and would be happier with their mother than at daycare.
The two are unrelated. Personally I think working each day is way easier than being bff a trad wife. It must be stated, I don’t think you understand this, being a SAHM is very, very hard. Way harder than holding down a job. I used to work 3 jobs, one full time, two part time, with no days off. I did that for 3 years. One of the hardest workloads of my life, it was still way easier than staying at home with a baby. At least I got breaks.