I get this all the time. I hate this response. Clearly, after being diagnosed at age 40, I have never used autism as an excuse.

Growing up, my mom told me she never had me evaluated for learning disorders because she "didn't want me using it as an excuse."

So, 40 years of being gaslit by society that my cognitive experiences and perceptions were the same as others and I just needed to "work harder" to function like everyone else while being blamed and shamed for my difficulties caused by autism as personality flaws and personal weakness, that was neccessary so I don't "use it as an excuse?" An excuse for what? Having issues caused by autism?

It kind of feels like someone is saying:

"Okay, so I guess you do have autism, can you just act like you don't? Just make your autism invisible please, or go back to making it invisible. I don't want to think about it. If not I will blame you for 'making excuses.'"

I feel like this attitude is especially prevalent for women. I was told a million times over how inconvenient it would be for me to have autism and I needed to just suck it up and work harder to over it up. Just grow up and stop having problems, it's inconvenient for everyone. Stop being so needy, problematic, drama-queen, demanding, difficult, immature.