I can relate. I dated this one woman once, she wasn’t an abuser or narcissistic or anything, but I felt so needy and demanding of her. I thought I had an insecure attachment style. After I broke up with her and met someone else, I realized I’m not insecure in my attachment style. Looking back I now see I fell head over heals for her. I’m not sure how she felt about me, but it’s pretty clear she didn’t feel the same way about me. As time went by it got worse with me wanting more from her, and her wanting more space from me. I’m glad I broke it off, because now I have someone who is just as crazy about me as I am her.
In my case, our affections were just miss matched.