Can you guess the song?
I forget who first did this here on medium, but I read an article somewhere here, when a story was written from the lyrics, and the game is to see if you can guess the song. So I figured I would give it a try. It wasn’t my idea, but let’s play! If you can guess what song this is, leave it in the comments below.
So, here are 5 stories, guess the song.
Song 1: The Wedding Dance
Down south, probably Vera Cruz, the wedding reception is getting started. People are dancing.
Now, in order to dance this particular dance, you’ve got to have a little bit of grace. Not a lot, just like, at least a little bit of grace. I need grace, you need grace, just a little bit. But wait, now up, up, up goes the tempo, come one, come on.
In the center of the dance floor is the bride and groom, and they are dancing too. The groom, he isn’t some idiot young kid, he’s a responsible, faithful husband.
“For you I will be” he says to his bride.
“For you I will be” the bride says to him.
“I ain’t a sailor” he tells her. What he means is “I ain’t some idiot sailor whose going to fuck around like he just landed here. I ain’t gonna go cheating you.”
He pauses.
“I am, THE CAPTAIN!” he shouts as he dances. And he can dance.
If you’re going to dance this dance, you need a little bit of grace as the tempo goes up and up.
This dance, it is, THE BOMB!
Song 2: The Creepy Voicemail from your Ex.
You arrive home after a long day, sit down on the coach, and get out your phone.
Oh no. There it is, again. You feel dread as you open up another, long, awful voicemail from your ex.
“Hello” says her low, sultry, sexy voice. You shiver, you are so tired of these calls. “It is I” she follows up. She wants to meet you. She explains that she isn’t healed from your breakup. She is on the west coast, remembering the good ‘ole days and obsessing about what it was like before.
You’ve clearly moved on, you are different, but she is stuck in the past.
She says hello from far away, she’s called literally thousands of times, to like, apologize for everything she had done. But you are seriously never, ever, going to answer when she calls you.
Doesn’t matter, she’s going to keep calling, and apologizing, for breaking your heart, even though she knows you have totally moved on, and even acknowledges it in the message she leaves!
For crying out loud, she broke up with you! And now that you have moved on with your life, she is still stuck on the past, calling you constantly. The whole thing is crazy and you don’t know what to do.
She continues with her message, first she apologizes for talking about herself so much, and wants to know if you still live in your boring hometown. Oh and she thinks that you and her are both getting way too old, implying that you should both settle down together. Wow, she really knows how to neg hun?
She’s contacting you from somewhere else, she wants to say at least she tried to apologize to you for breaking your heart, but she knows you don’t care and you’re never going to pick up when she calls. But she’s still going to call you.
You get out a small notebook, write down the date and times of the call. Next week you will take your evidence to the courthouse and attempt to get a restraining order aganst her. You hope they take the harassment seriously.
The phone rings again.
Song 3: He has a crush on his friend’s girlfriend.
Two guys have been close buddies for years. But one started dating this girl, and his friend has a huge crush on her. The friend really likes the girlfriend, and he’s now fantasizing about them together. He fantasizes about the girlfriend watching her boyfriend, checking him out. He fantasizes about them having sex, at night and wishes it was him. He wants to find a girlfriend like that. Where can he get one?
Should he tell the girlfriend how he feels? No, that’s not a good reason. He feels so bad when they show affection. Naw, if he tells her she probably won’t even care.
Why doesn’t he have the girlfriend instead of his buddy? He has a good sense of humor, isn’t that what it takes? He looks in the mirror wondering why the girl picked his friend instead of him.
He wants his friend’s girlfriend. He want’s his friend’s girlfriend. He wants his friend’s girlfriend.
Story 4: Add for a cheap hotel and gym.
Hey! Are you a young guy who is lonely? Did you just move here from a new city? Now you have no friends, don’t have a place to live, and don’t have any good hobbies? Come live here! We can rent you a temporary room for hella cheep! Also we have a gym where you can work out! There’s even a pool! There are other dudes staying here as well, you can make friends. This is a great place! We are really here to serve our community. You can come and work out in our gym, have a private room, and meet other guys your age! Don’t worry, it’s not gay at all. In fact, we’re very religious, kind of, maybe, whatever. Make your dreams a reality. Don’t be proud now, everyone needs some support every now and then. Anyway, it’s fun to stay here!
Story 5: I was seduced by a woman with no furniture, then possibly commited arson?
This guy had sex with a woman, or did she have sex with him? Whatever, it’s the same thing. She took him to her room and asked him if he liked her fancy wood panneling and floor. We don’t know what he said, if anything. Maybe he didn’t I guess.
Anyway, she asked him to stay and he did. He noticed there were no chairs in the room. So he sat on a rug. I think they drank wine and talked to two o’clock a.m. in the morning. The she told him it’s time for them to have sex.
A few hours later she woke up him up and laughed at him. He was still tired, and wanted to sleep, so he crawled in her bathtub and napped there.
He woke up later and was alone. So then he started a fire. He may or may not have burned down her wood-paneled room. We shall never know.
Can you guess the songs? If so, comment below.
