Great article. I’m so glad to hear this conversation.
I was recently diagnosed for autism, and my evaluator diagnosed me with something else.
He explained that my sensory issues were pretty high, even for an autistic.
He told me I have PTSD from my sensory issues. I had to admit he was right, as there is clear cut definitive evidence of PTSD and I meet the diagnostic requirements.
However, when I explained this to a friend of mine, that I have PTSD from sensory overload, I found her giving me a dubious look, and asking her “it sounds melodramatic doesn’t it?” And she said she thought so. Nuerotypicals don’t get how debilitating sensory overload is. But it’s clear cut and dry that this has harmed me. All of my life I’ve been gaslit with “just try it a little bit, don’t be so dramatic, it’s not that big of a deal, stop being so spoiled” when they have no idea about the hell I’m in.
For me, the scariest thing is, when I go into sensory overload, I risk becoming violent. I am a teacher, I work with children, and I have never been violent to anyone. However I know I could be when in sensory overload. It literally feels like I’m being assaulted and I enter a fight or flight state. For years I coped with this by self injuring, the pain I felt from self-injury was way easier to handle than the hell of sensory overload, and helped me distract from what I was experiencing. Eventually I realized that wasn’t how I wanted to live my life, especially when it damaged my body.
However, my tactile defensiveness prevents me from doing things that are expected in society.
I can’t wear most types of shoes, only specific types of open-toe shoes.
I can’t wear bras (I am a large chested woman). I could literally be fired for this, and I know it. But it’s better than sticking sharp pins my arms to distract myself by inducing pain. I wish that it was more socially accepted for women to chose to be braless. For me it’s an actual fucking disability.
I can’t wear pants, except lose PJs. At work I wear exclusively long skirts.
I can only wear certain types of shirts.

I hate that people judge me on clothing choices. I generally dress very appropriately, despite my limited wardrobe, but people get curious about my shoes, or long skirts, and make all kinds of assumptions about me and my “style.” I hate it. Why people obsess about clothes and footware, IDK. I just want to left alone and not try to explain to nuerotypicals something don’t experience and probably won’t understand. Yes I do want to look nice, but mostly I just wanna wear clothes safely. After that then I go for cute. Safety first.